Lucky-dip Tea: relieve mental stress

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There is an infinite number of choices you could make in your day and in your life. Some are in your control and some are not. Some are clear, some feel impossible to make. Creating some personal rituals to relieve some of the burden from choice can help relieve mental stress. They can also be a gorgeous act of love to yourself.

Meet my little Himalayan tea box. I bought it 25 years ago in Kathmandu, Nepal. It’s been glued many times and has lived in over 20 houses (and a boat and a bus). Whenever I used to travel, I would buy some tea, something that smelt (incense, oil), a postcard, a cook book and some local music. So when I came back, I could use all my senses to recreate my experience of being in that country.

Once I’d drunken all the loose-leaf tea in this tea box I filled it with tea bags. I’m a fan of anything Dilmah (my mother was in love with Mr Dilmah). My tea box with a mix of Earl Grey, Lady Grey. and English Breakfast. Each morning, I drink whatever is at the top. I don’t give myself the choice.

I love looking at my little box. I love touching its original hinge and opening the lid. I have layers of experience and feelings when I have my cup of tea. The little box also holds times where tears would fall into my cup. Or times when I was so stressed and outside of myself that I’d only ever have a couple of sips before I’d rush on, forgetting that I even had made a cup of tea. It holds the past and potential for the future, but really it brings me joy in the moment.

Rituals that cut through the clutter and hardship of life are extremely important. Do you have one that, like being on your yoga mat, fills you with ease or a hint of joy? How can you create more?

A friend asked me a few days ago where the Buddhism saying “life is suffering” comes from. My original meditation study came from Shambhala and the teachings of Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche and his son Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche (I will forever by grateful for these teachings). Yesterday I had a reminder of these teachings. I was waiting at the traffic lights, and I noticed the woman in the double lane next to me. She was gripping the steering wheel. She was grinding her teeth - I could see the muscles in her jaw tense and release. Her lips were tight. The woman was stuck in whatever scenario or thoughts that took her away from where she was. Because if she was aware - present with her current experience of being in her body - she would have noticed the tension she was grinding for herself. That is suffering. The object of her suffering may not change, but her experience of it can. You can’t change something you don’t have awareness or insight of.

Can we be mindful every single minute of the day? Kind of hard unless you are a nun living in the Himalayas. It takes baby steps until you find yourself standing, only to tumble down and try it all over again!

I shook the hands of the Dalai Lama once when I was part of Friends of Tibet and every cell and nerve in my body melted into a feeling of love. Yoga and being mindful can evoke this. Yoga is a practice. Each time you witness your own experience, you get to see what that really is.

The experiences from yoga practice (which includes physical poses, breath, intention, meditation) bring you into your current experience, whatever that is, on and off the mat. You gain insight and clarity for your own suffering and joy. You come to a clearer understanding of how you are living your life - how disconnected you may be to nature, to others, and ultimately, to your own experience. Funnily enough, original texts of yoga are not about the physical poses. These texts are about mindfulness, meditation, surrender, and your approach and discipline of life.

There is an observance in yoga from a group of yamas, called satya. Satya can be translated as truth. It’s not just about not telling lies, Satya is more about living in truth and harmony with a mindful experience of being human - that of being integrated, whole and undivided. Satya is when what we do and what we feel are the same. This is what I hope the people who come through my studio get a glimpse of when they are here.

And this is how I feel when I enjoy my little tea box. There is no suffering when I open the lid of this box. I feel calm and present. I accept what tea I will drink that morning no matter what it is. I may then go on to have batshit crazy moments in my day, but I have an internal barometer of how else to feel and how else to be. And the more I deepen and elongate my own practice of yoga, the less batshit crazy moments I have!

What’s a little thing, special to you, that you can do have a moment where you are present, and feel special, and ease - even for a moment? I’d love to hear yours. Please share on my Facebook page.