The side of relaxation you may not know (yet)

You are probably familiar with how the stress response affects your body: Your nervous system goes into fight or flight and increases your heart rate; your immunity and hormone regulation is largely shut down; you crave more fat and carbs because the mind is telling the body it needs to eat these kinds of foods to survive; and your brain function gets microscopic and cannot cope with more than surviving.

You are also probably familiar with the relaxation response in your body: Your nervous system switches to rest and digest: your heart rate lowers and blood pressure decreases; your immune system is activated to fight off harmful bugs; hormones that are terrible for you in longer-term doses like cortisol are no longer produced; your clever scrummy hormones like melatonin (for sleep) and dopamine (for feelin’ good) increase and flood your body; your weight is balanced and you feel pretty good.

There is a side to relaxation that you may not know (yet). You’ll have an inkling of it because you’ve been there at times. You’ve had an awesome, relaxing holiday and come up with a creative idea for your life. Or you’ve been for a bush walk, listened to a meditation track, or been to a yoga class. How do those things come about and how can you get more of them so that you feel calmer more of the time?

When your body is relaxed your mind chills and you become calmer, creative and more positive.

When your mind receives signals from your physical body that everything is okay, your body relaxes. The uber energy spent on the stress response via the nervous system is no longer needed. This energy can now be redirected to all the other crucial functions in your body. You switch into this state by calming down enough for the brain to enter calmer brain wave states. Think of the luscious time before you drop into sleep - you’ve disconnected from your thoughts and your body is physically relaxed. You are about to enter dreaming. You can reach this state while you are awake through calming practices (more on that later), signaling to your mind that it is no longer needed to just keep you alive. It now has energy and focus to direct the body to heal and other yummy things.

You become calmer. Your mind’s sole job is to keep you safe. It is always looking for signals from the outside world so it knows whether to put you in a stress response or a relaxation response. That’s where most of your energy goes - into fueling your mind and body for this basic function. Many people live in chronic stress - there are no tigers in the room to run from, but your mind thinks there is. They are on the go, go go and feel mentally and emotionally overwhelmed, all of their waking life. Their sleep is effected. Their digestion is poor. If this sounds like you, take a breath, give yourself a hug and please read on.

When you enter a calmer brain wave state from being physically and mentally relaxed, you are more creative. You enter more of a non-doing space. There are more gaps between your thoughts. These gaps give space for your creativity to fire. When you enter deep relaxation, or a meditative state, you mind slows into Theta brainwave states. Kamini Desai mentions in her book Yoga Nidra: The Art of Transformational Sleep (my bible) that artists, inventors and children can often have more Theta brainwave activity, even when they are awake. I’m at my most creative when I’ve just started to relax. It’s a bit annoying sometimes - I always have to have a pen and paper near by!

You become more positive. I don’t mean fake happy, I mean something more ordinary and unwaivering (no matter what life throws at you): A deep, rich doubtless feeling that life is going to be okay and not have so many manic ups and painful downs. In Sharon Salzberg’s book Faith she talks about a concept called Bright Faith. I’ve taken this as accepting where you are right now, but also knowing that the beautiful view in front of you is not only somewhere you are not only heading to, but also that you feel the essence of this beautiful new place from where you are right now. Practicing Bright Faith can only be done when you are in the relaxation response - when your body and mind are calmer. You cannot heal and realise new things for yourself when you are stressed. Your mind does not and will not do it for you. It’s just trying to survive.

How do I know this?

I’m not a flash scientist or medical expert. But I have transformed myself from chronic stress, overwhelm and pre-disease to someone who has a new lease on life. I am into recovery from Long Covid, digestive issues and heart palpitations. I’m healthier, happier and I can’t wait for the rest of my life. A few years ago, I was just trying to survive and I felt like shite every day. I also know about these lesser known effects of the relaxation response because I do practices every day to get me there. I have also ditched my super-stressful career and retrained as a yoga teacher. My little studio, BeCalmed Studio, at the back of my house in native bush, is a restorative haven. Now it’s here for you. I don’t make much money but I live each day being able to share what has worked for me. I’m in love with the practices I teach as are nearly everyone who comes through the studio.

What practices will help you enter this super-relaxation state?

Restorative yoga, yin yoga, breath work, and Mother of all Good Things - Yoga Nidra. Our version of Yoga Nidra is called BeCalmed: Mind Rest. Our method is the I AM Yoga Nidra method, from my teacher, the wonderful Kamini Desai. She has passed on teachings from her father and his lineage of yoga wisdom.

These active relaxation practices are gentle and easy, and switch your body over into the relaxation response, guaranteed. You don’t really do much except relax your body and listen to me! You take shapes and breath that promote tension release. And you listen to a lying-down guided meditation, Yoga Nidra, to have a super release of mental tension. You enter a meditative state that is similar to that space between awake and asleep.

The yoga where you put your foot behind your head works for many people. So does the more restorative sides of yoga. They all end up in similar place though - relaxing the body to relax the mind.

So if you want to feel better and do life better - with a little more calm - don’t use the same strategy that go you here in the first place. Try something different. Get some calm in your life, right now.

How can you practice?

BeCalmed: Mind Rest - Tuesdays 6.30pm - online via Zoom

BeCalmed: Mind Rest - Tuesdays 6.30pm - forest-studio, Titahi Bay, Porirua

First class free - use coupon - becalmed1

Let me know what’s going on with you and we can choose the right class for you. Aroha nui ki a koe.

Or do these free things, right now

Try this restorative yoga pose, Legs up the Wall or listen to my short guided meditation to bring about calm. Or listen regularly to this short breathing track. You can also find me on InsightTimer.